Have you ever found yourself lost? Not in the sense that you have absolutely no idea where you are - but more that you have somewhat of an idea but you just aren't sure how to get to the place you are attempting to get to? Please tell me I'm not the only one!
This is where I find myself today. I pulled out of my driveway just a bit ago in Katy, TX and made a few turns with complete confidence that I was on my way to the Y. Then I realized - I'm actually headed in the wrong direction. I did a U-turn and Asher immediately asked why. I explained that this is what I do these days. I am learning, so I turn around often. I am learning, so I make mistakes. I am learning, so getting some place takes a little bit longer these days.
And now, as I sit waiting to take the BODYPUMP class at my new YMCA, I'm amazed at those simple words I spoke to my son just a few minutes ago. I was speaking then about learning how to get around in this new place I call home...but I could have just as easily been speaking about this road to health that I've been journeying on for the last 3 years. In the grand scheme of life, 3 years isn't a large amount of time - and I'm still learning.
I'm still learning, so I turn around often. These days when it comes to food I feel like I'm going in circles. I know what I need to do, but then we go out to eat and I just eat the food that comforts me. If I can't control life, I guess I'll control the food that I eat - and I'll make sure it tastes delicious. Yes, I'll have a burger with onion straws, cheese, BBQ sauce, and a bun. Yes, I'll have that ice cream. Yes, I'll eat that pizza. Thank you. Today, I'm turning around. I'm turning back to the habits that fuel me, instead of the processed food-like product that makes me oh so tired.
I am learning, so I make mistakes. I also make some out right decisions that lead me in the opposite way than I really want to go. Today, I repent for these mistakes - these mistakes that I call sins. These instances when I have chosen the ice cream as a way to soothe myself, rather than the Great Healer Himself. I'm apologizing for attempting to control my emotions and my fears with food instead of laying them at the feet of Jesus. Today, I'm saying, "Lord, forgive me. And help me to lean into You because You are in control."
I am learning, so getting some place takes a little bit longer these days. The past few months have been a whirlwind of change, change, and more change. This caused me to get out of some of the habits that had become normal to me - meal planning, prepping, and a daily workout to name a few of them. In the midst of all that is still brand new, finding a new normal, a new routine will take time. I could simply make a plan and start working it (which I am all about doing), but I know that I need to take time to build up habits again or my giant plan will fail after two days because I'll be exhausted. So, I'm going to get to a place where I'm meal planning, prepping, and working out daily again - but I'm not going to jump all in just yet. I'm going to get my feet wet - and here's how.
1. I'll process this process as I go. I'll assess this process each Monday to see what I need to add, or adjust, or remove. My hope is to process it here - but we'll see. If that isn't actually helpful to my journey - I won't do it.
2. I'll try the BODYPUMP class today, Wednesday, and Friday.
3. I'm doing a modified Whole7 as a reset this week. Except I'm putting honey in my coffee, and eating brown rice that's been soaked.
As I continue to walk through one of the biggest changes of my life, I will continue to pour out the grace for my emotions! However, I won't be giving myself grace on the eating front. I know better. So, I must do better.
This is where I find myself today. I pulled out of my driveway just a bit ago in Katy, TX and made a few turns with complete confidence that I was on my way to the Y. Then I realized - I'm actually headed in the wrong direction. I did a U-turn and Asher immediately asked why. I explained that this is what I do these days. I am learning, so I turn around often. I am learning, so I make mistakes. I am learning, so getting some place takes a little bit longer these days.
And now, as I sit waiting to take the BODYPUMP class at my new YMCA, I'm amazed at those simple words I spoke to my son just a few minutes ago. I was speaking then about learning how to get around in this new place I call home...but I could have just as easily been speaking about this road to health that I've been journeying on for the last 3 years. In the grand scheme of life, 3 years isn't a large amount of time - and I'm still learning.
I'm still learning, so I turn around often. These days when it comes to food I feel like I'm going in circles. I know what I need to do, but then we go out to eat and I just eat the food that comforts me. If I can't control life, I guess I'll control the food that I eat - and I'll make sure it tastes delicious. Yes, I'll have a burger with onion straws, cheese, BBQ sauce, and a bun. Yes, I'll have that ice cream. Yes, I'll eat that pizza. Thank you. Today, I'm turning around. I'm turning back to the habits that fuel me, instead of the processed food-like product that makes me oh so tired.
I am learning, so I make mistakes. I also make some out right decisions that lead me in the opposite way than I really want to go. Today, I repent for these mistakes - these mistakes that I call sins. These instances when I have chosen the ice cream as a way to soothe myself, rather than the Great Healer Himself. I'm apologizing for attempting to control my emotions and my fears with food instead of laying them at the feet of Jesus. Today, I'm saying, "Lord, forgive me. And help me to lean into You because You are in control."
I am learning, so getting some place takes a little bit longer these days. The past few months have been a whirlwind of change, change, and more change. This caused me to get out of some of the habits that had become normal to me - meal planning, prepping, and a daily workout to name a few of them. In the midst of all that is still brand new, finding a new normal, a new routine will take time. I could simply make a plan and start working it (which I am all about doing), but I know that I need to take time to build up habits again or my giant plan will fail after two days because I'll be exhausted. So, I'm going to get to a place where I'm meal planning, prepping, and working out daily again - but I'm not going to jump all in just yet. I'm going to get my feet wet - and here's how.
1. I'll process this process as I go. I'll assess this process each Monday to see what I need to add, or adjust, or remove. My hope is to process it here - but we'll see. If that isn't actually helpful to my journey - I won't do it.
2. I'll try the BODYPUMP class today, Wednesday, and Friday.
3. I'm doing a modified Whole7 as a reset this week. Except I'm putting honey in my coffee, and eating brown rice that's been soaked.
As I continue to walk through one of the biggest changes of my life, I will continue to pour out the grace for my emotions! However, I won't be giving myself grace on the eating front. I know better. So, I must do better.
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